WUnderground WashU's Premier (only) Satirical Newspaper Est. 2004
Describing the event as āone of the more harrowing experiences of [her] young life,ā sophomore, Eliza Furman, recounted how a routine weekly call to her grandmother took a turn for the worse when her aging Bubbe refused to allow the conversation to end. The call began as normal, with ...
November, 2015
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4 November
Student Life Investigates Leaves Falling from Trees: Fraternities at Fault
A recent investigation investigation conducted by Student Life, WashUās premier [only] nonsatirical independent student newspaper, studied why leaves have been changing colors and suspiciously disappearing from trees, concluding campus fraternities were behind the stunt. The two-week-long investigation included thorough questioning of eye-witnesses, a comprehensive student survey, and other strategies often ...
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4 November
Office of Sustainability Launches Seasonal Initiative: #NoWipeNovember
WashUās environmental friendliness has always been a source of pride for the administration and student body. Over the past few years the school removed every trash can from campus, forbade all students and alums from ever purchasing SUVs, and stopped selling bottled water. In recognition of these exceptional steps, the ...
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4 November
SubMarines: New Delmar Cafe Hires Only Vets With Extreme PTSD
In an effort to ease veterans back into the workforce, a new local eatery called āSubMarinesā is exclusively hiring former soldiers who suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). To smooth their transition, owner Tex āSargeā Denver tries to find common ground between their experiences in the field of war and ...
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4 November
Last Freshman Finally Disenchanted with WashU
Sniffling hopelessly over the stream of tears that drenched the remains of her taco salad, freshman Emily Weitzman finally became the last member of the Class of 2019 to abandon her hopeful image of Washington University. The soggy, lukewarm appropriation of Mexican food was the last straw, according to reports, ...