WUnderground WashU's Premier (only) Satirical Newspaper Est. 2004
WashU’s social programming board announced Wednesday that their decision for Spring WILD is still under heavy debate. After failing to produce a Fall WILD, SPB feels pressure to deliver a high profile artist for this spring’s concert. We asked SPB representative Jessica Higgins for a quote, to which she replied “no comment” after pushing past us in Einstein’s bakery.
After following her for 6 hours, Jessica, a non chain-smoker, told us “It’s a big fuckin’ problem. The flow isn’t necessarily riding that smooth on this one. Young and giant bands just don’t really want to play for a bunch of bratty college kids.” Ludacris wasn’t going to be playing, she added.
While many students are eagerly awaiting a fun day of day drinking and passing out before 2pm, some are less than stoked. Sean, a big sophomore from Portugal, told Wunderground: “Yeah, I’m actually deciding on skipping WILD this year. Probably just gonna get high in my Lamborghini instead.”
As of press time, it remains hard to tell whether students will go WILD for the night when April 28th rolls around. Given the highly varied music tastes across students, our editorial board hopes that SPB can pick a Goldie-locks act: someone with broad appeal. However, it’s not looking great. With their long history of picking shitty acts, we’ll probably get stuck with someone like ASAP Rocky. Have a great WILD everyone!
